A “99%er” gets schooled on the joys of large corporations after her car gets smashed
Got a call from Highway Patrol for a “Motorcycle Down,” a major injury accident.
Jumped in my truck and headed to where it was supposed to be, and of course it was actually in the other direction from where they told us it was, so I did some fancy maneuvering and entered the freeway going the other direction.
On arriving to the scene, there was a Harley-Davidson with its front end mangled sitting behind a Mini Cooper with all the fashionable leftist bumper stickers on the back.
I was only called to pick the bike up, so I loaded it and off I went to the tow yard to put it in a safe place.
A half hour later, an insurance company called us to tow a Mini Cooper that was in an accident, but the place was across town from the original motorcycle collision, so I never connected the earlier accident until I arrived to the supposed “accident scene” to find a perfectly normal intersection. WTF?
Called dispatch and told Knucklehead “Nothing here, heading back. Call the insurance company and figure it out,” and off I went.
The boss’s house was just around the corner, so I decided to swing by there and give him a hard time (also didn’t want to get too far away from the location they gave us before – just in case), and sure enough the insurance company called back with the same location as the Harley wreck earlier in the day. Wanted her car picked up from the freeway and delivered to a local body shop.
Off I went back across town again, I knew exactly what/who I was looking for now.
I pulled up in front of the vehicle on the right shoulder, and backed ups to it just as the insurance company was calling us for an ETA. I told them: “Umm, now,” and I got out to talk to the woman.
I just finished getting the license plate info from the rear of the car, and I said “Interesting bumper sticker,” (referring to the 99% sticker above), “You may have just gotten rear-ended by a real ’1%er’ today, if the guy was in a biker club!”
She hadn’t given that any thought, it seems, as her face turned white. Then she joked “A bourgeois biker?” I thought that was pretty funny, maybe she wasn’t a hard-core lefty after all?
She was very concerned that her insurance company would cover everything, the towing, etc. and I assured her it did.
“Yep, thank God for Big Insurance, eh? This would cost you around $95!”
She was also concerned that she wouldn’t have a ride off the freeway, and I told her I wouldn’t just leave her at the side of the road, and I would, in fact, drop her off at a place where she could get a car rental. Another rather large corporation, by the way.
So off we went.
“You know,” I started, “I understand the whole 99% bumper sticker thing, but what exactly is the ‘Economic Justice’ part about?”
She went blank, “I dunno, really, hee hee!”
“What,” I had to push it, “Somebody just stuck that thing there?”
When she didn’t answer immediately, I avoided any possible “pregnant pause” action by asking “You have the phone number and address for the body shop I’m taking your car to? You’ll need to call them Monday.”
“Um, no, I’ll have to look it up…”
When we got to the car rental agency, I asked he for her cell number, and texted her the address and number to the body shop for her future use. She was frankly amazed, for some reason, that I’d do that for her.
I made sure she had everything she’d need out of her car (house keys removed from the ignition key, phone charger, etc.) and she smiled gratefully “Thank you for everything!”
I waved goodbye, and as I was climbing back into my truck I said with a smile; “By the way, I’m a Republican.”
I never looked back for her reaction, I just gunned it and headed off to
help some other poor helpless person make some more money.